Hmm, I wrote this post but somehow forgot to publish it. Here it is, outdate by about a week, but better late than never.
So, one of the things that I haven’t had a chance to follow-up on is how Henry is doing now that I am not breast-feeding.
It has been about 4 months since Henry’s last breast-feeding, and Continue reading
Besides my low milk supply and my overabundance of eternal guilt about not providing enough food for my child, Charlie also had acid reflux and colic. Oh yay! Another reason to feel even more guilty. I took personal responsibility for his “immature digestive system” as it was called by the doctors. It was my milk that was making him reflux. It was my milk that was hard for him to digest. Rationally I knew I was a good mom, but I felt horrible that I couldn’t make him better.
For us, battling against colic was a futile endeavor, but there were a few ways to get some control of the situation. These 5 coping mechanisms occupied my all day, everyday for Charlie’s first 3 months on this planet. To quote my doctor, “you are one of the lucky families to have a baby with colic 24 hours a day.” He didn’t actually have colic 24 hours a day, but he did sometimes have it up to 15 hours a day, almost every day.
2 Solutions for momentary calm:
Air:
My first plan of attack everyday was to take Charlie outside when the inconsolable crying started. The second he hit the fresh air he would stop crying. Of course, he would start crying again the second we went back inside.
Water:
Another defense from the constant crying, was to run a bath for Charlie. The second he hit the water he would stop crying. Often times the crying would start again the second I took him out of the water, but those few minutes were like precious vacations from the hell that was colic.
My favorite activity during his colic phase was to get in the bath, bring him in with me and breast feed him while I got some much-needed R & R. He was so happy and calm in the bath and I actually got a moment to relax as well.
3 Solutions that might end up in a sleeping baby:
Wearing:
I think I owe my sanity to the creators of the Ergo. I would wear Charlie in the Ergo all day long with the infant insert. I don’t know if it was my heartbeat, the warmth of being close to me, the movement or all three, but the Ergo almost always induced sleep. ”Nap when the baby is napping” is advice that was lost upon me because if I stopped moving, he would wake up.
Swaddling:
Charlie couldn’t cope with his arms and legs free. We had to double swaddle him so he wouldn’t break free of its constraints. Once we got the swaddle on nice and tight he might calm down a bit. Our trick was a double layer swaddle. The first layer was an actual swaddle blanket. Then we would wrap him up in a velcro swaddle. This assured that he wouldn’t break free. It sounds archaic, but he really did love it.
Movement/Bouncing
Once he was swaddled, it was time to bounce. We must have bounced on the birthing ball for hours at a time. In times of desperation we would also put him in the car seat and go for a drive. Sometimes I would have to drive for 2 or more hours to get him to fall asleep. Once he fell asleep I would put the car seat in the crib because transferring him from the car seat to the crib was impossible. The times when we did try the transfer, he would wake up, cry and the whole soothing process would start over again.
I have heard from other moms with colicky babies that some of these options worked for them as well. For Charlie, we would often times have to combine one or more of these coping mechanisms in order to calm him down. Sometimes it would calm him for minutes, other times it created the perfect recipe for a longer stretch of calm.
In hindsight, I am glad that I did not blog about Charlie’s colic in real-time. This way, I am able to squeeze it all into one or two posts.
I know that most moms will say that their child has colic at one time or another during their infancy. Let me make one thing clear: just because a baby is fussy does not mean they have colic. These words are not synonymous. Colic at best is uncontrollable crying that lasts at least 3 hours at a time, at least 3 days a week. It usually occurs at night. In some instances, however, a baby (and the parents) can suffer from colic all day long, all week-long.
At about 3 weeks old, Charlie’s “angel baby” status began to shift. He went from sleeping all of the time and waking up for feedings to the baby that cried all of the time, fell asleep for a short time and then needed food. I’ll break down a typical scenario.
Let’s start with a feeding…
Charlie would eat. The second he stopped feeding he started crying. I would change him, record how much he ate and drank, if he pooped and then swaddle him back up. The crying would last anywhere from 45 minutes to 2 hours, at which point he would either fall asleep or need to be fed again. If he did happen to fall asleep he would startle awake only to cry inconsolably. At most, he would get 10 – 30 minutes of sleep at a time, which meant I was getting about 5 to 20 minutes of sleep.
Getting Charlie to sleep was a task unto itself. First, we would turn the swing on without him in it. Then we would bounce on the birthing ball. The only way he would fall asleep was a combination of falling asleep in our arms while we bounced on the birthing ball. If we stopped bouncing too early we would have to start the bouncing process all over again. Once we got him to sleep, setting him down was like handling TNT. We had to be very careful not to jostle him in any way or he would explode. Then we would go bounce on the ball. Once he fell asleep, we had to transfer him into the moving swing or he would wake up. Honestly, we basically played defense for his first 3 months of life. It wasn’t until month 4 that we began worrying about creating bad habits. So, until that time, this is mostly how he slept.
His swing was our greatest ally
We went to the doctor multiple times a week. I called the doctor every single day. I was convinced that something was medically wrong with my baby. All he did was cry. He would not stop when we held him. We tried bouncing him on the bouncy ball, driving for hours at a time, putting him in his car seat on top of the dryer with a shoe tumbling inside. We tried Mylicon, Gripe Water and Zantac. Noise machines and lullabies. Nothing worked to pacify this child.
We tried everything...
Finally, the doctor proclaimed that we were one of the lucky families who had a baby with colic 24 hours a day. Truth be told, I was at my wits end with this kid. I wanted to return him or give him away. All I kept thinking was why did we have a baby when we have a perfect dog who is so easy to take care of? I’m not gonna lie, both my husband and I were not secretive about the fact that we loved Sherman, our dog, way more than we did our own flesh and blood.
Here’s a picture of Charlie that we took when he was one month hold. It pretty much captures what living with Charlie was like for the first 3 months. He was yellow and angry…
I was supposed to be born today, not one month old!
Luckily for us, his colic did go away. His system decided to settle down on May 29th, 2010, our anniversary weekend. It was the greatest present we could have ever asked for.
